Deciding it's a Gift and not a Burden

Our pastor at church is in the midst of a unique series called "Servolution". It's about learning to, and giving us opportunities to serve others. Part of what started this whole thing is a lemonade stand that our church family will be running during the South Plains Fair.

This past weekend, Pastor B discussed how to find your spiritual gifts. My husband elbowed me several times during some of the options.

Yet, as I sat there, my mind wondered, about what my gifts were.

See, I always wanted to do something that made a difference. Apparently I should have been more specific, and I've definitely picked the wrong major if I wanted a career that made a difference. Although, I did pick my career based on something that I love to do, that I enjoy, which makes me excited to sit through millions of hours of classes each semester. Can crazy be a gift?

So as Pastor B talked, I wondered what I'm good at.

I'm a nurturer by nature. I like to do things for other people. My friend Andrea that was diagnosed with cancer this year can agree to that. I've shared the wealth more often than not, that she probably gets tired of the text messages involving care packages for dinner, breakfast, and dessert. Although, I totally love sharing. It's nice to make a cake, and have someone enjoy the other half of it, instead of the creatures that roam the dumpster in the dead of night. I'd rather not think about those creatures, because they have beady little eyes, full of evil, and long twitchy tails, and they are just roaming the streets looking for tasty morsels.

Fabulous, now I'm not going to want to let my dogs out when it's dark tonight. Fan-freaking-tastic.

I like to listen to people talk. Not necessarily joining in, but just listening and observing. You learn a lot about people that way. Another of my friends, wiggles her hands when she is discussing something she would rather not be talking about. She rubs on her fingernails, and constantly moves her fingers. My husband, avoids eye contact. He looks down when he would rather not have the conversation with you or even glancing away while talking to you. My mother-in-law likes to dictate the flow of conversation. She likes the subject to change when she has nothing else to say about it, not necessarily when the rest of the group is ready to move on. So it makes me observant, and when something interests me in the conversation, I add to it. Or manage to say something that pisses someone off, depends on who's around and how much sarcasm I used. Super powers shouldn't get you in so much trouble, should they?

Back to Servolution. They were asking for volunteers, and frankly I miss church when we don't go. I never regret it. In fact, I have this amazing analogy that will probably have me skinned for making on my blog.

Church is like sex. Once I get there, I wonder why we don't go more often. Or why we don't have sex more often. Not while we are at church, but just in general. My husband goes to bed at 6pm. I have homework. You do the math. It's not easy to do either, but it's always worth it in the end.

 

Sorry John. Aunt D. My old youth minister's wife. Mom. Dad. Andrea.

 

 So volunteers. Well, they have this bible study at TTU on Thursday nights. So I thought, you know, maybe if I got to know some of the losers, underage hooligans, babies, youngins, fellow students, I might not feel like I'm all that much older than them. So because I had procrastinated, because let's face it, I'm not a people person. I don't like talking in front of crowds, or in front of small groups either. I don't like being put on the spot, even with people I know. So I hadn't emailed the guy in charge and told him that I would offer up my services. Just couldn't do it. So my husband drug me, by my hair, kicking and screaming to meet with the guy after church.

 

Here's how much I'm not a "people - person".

 

"Hi, I'm Abby Normal, and you don't know me, but I'm fantastic and you should."

 

Yep, totally said that. Still not sure why, but I was nervous, and I say goofy stuff. And that was just talking to him with no one but my husband as a witness. So I spewed out that I went back to school, blah blah blah, did he need help on Thursdays. All the while, praying he would say no. So apparently, the 30th, I'm serving pizza and bottles of water to college students, and trying not to vomit or say something goofy. It's going to be interesting to say the least. Will I regret doing it, probably not. But for the next 3 years, because that's probably how long it will take for me not to want to hurl before I walk in the door, I'll do it. Because, believe it or not, part of me would like to step out of my comfort zone.

 

The other part of me, well, she would like to find something that makes a difference. Not necessarily so that I can feel good about what I'm doing for someone else, but so that I can feel good about who I am again. Because somewhere along the way, I've lost that girl who wasn't afraid to take on the world. I've lost the girl who wanted her life to matter, not to someone else, but to myself. I'd like to find her, before I get older and have any regrets about what I could have done, if I'd only been less selfish, and less afraid of talking to strangers.

My mom should be so proud, apparently she nailed the "don't talk to strangers" lesson, since it still works on a 25, 29, 30, 32 year old.

These are a few of my favorite things

I swore that I would try not to neglect this little blog anymore, simply because I wasn't in the mood. Well, today, I'm not in the mood. I'm tired, I'm grouchy, and I'm most certainly not in the mood to write a sarcastic blog post. Especially when most of what I want to do involves a nap.

So, because that's the case, and because I don't have much other excitement going on right now. I'm going to share a few of my most visited places on the world wide web.

FOOD
Tasty Kitchen - I use this when I just want ideas. There are tons of recipes for just about every single thing that you can imagine. I have made tons of recipes off this site and they are always wonderful and mouthwatering and leave us begging for more.

Pinterest - I have found some amazing recipes and amazing blogs through this handy little time waster. Not only can your friends help you find amazing recipes, pictures, tutorials, even crochet patterns, but you can repin your favorites and help your friends find things that you love to cook, bake, or even make!

Taste of Home - What can I say, I subscribe to a couple of the magazines because they just have some amazing recipes.

Picky Palate - Three words. Oh Em Gee! She has the weirdest recipes, probably known to man. But I don't care. They are amazing. They are rich. They are so hard to not hoard them from your husband and not tell him where you hid the leftovers. Not that I've done that.  Much.

BLOGS
The Pioneer Woman - She is funny. She can cook some amazingly, decadent, wonderful food. She lives on a farm. It's like my childhood with humor.

Kevin and Amanda - She can cook some amazing stuff. She gives great blog tutorials, photography tutorials, and heck, even cooking tutorials. She shares amazing finds and just neat little gadgets. She is funny, yet, sweet and personable at the same time. She is my go-to person for blog questions.

Lauren - She shares her life and her beautiful daughter Taylor, as well as her green beans. When I'm having a day where all I want to do is feel sorry for myself for not having a baby, I read Lauren's blog. Her faith, her life, her daughter are all an inspiration.

Amanda - She is an infertility survivor. Her story is amazing. She and her husband adopted a beautiful little girl. Her story is full of hope and joy.

Kit - She blogs about sex in the real married world. Well, the mostly real married world. She's snarky and funny and sarcastic. And if it were possible, I would like to borrow half of her self confidence and audacity, and I might be cool after all of that.


Enjoy! Hopefully I'll be more up to the task of an actual post tomorrow.

The Adventure with Yeast

To kick off my Christmas vacation and to prepare myself for the upcoming holiday. I decided, well, actually I had promised my husband months ago that while I was out of school I would make him cinnamon rolls. From scratch. Using yeast.

Yeast and I had never been properly introduced so I was a little nervous taking him out for our first date. My type A personality likes things very black and white. When it says double, I want to be able to take a measuring take and see that in fact it has grown from 6 to exactly 12 inches. Anything less than that or more than that is cause for panic. Baking requires you to let go and not assume that your results will always follow the recipe, or the picture. It's enough to drive a person to drink.

So I dig out the rusty, trusty, and slightly dusty (note to self: dust more) cookbook. I make the trek to the store to gather the needed ingredients and then I set off to work. As I read over the directions and estimated the total time required for these beauties, and the yeast to work it's magic, I figured that these would be no problem to whip out in an afternoon.

I followed the directions, and even went so far as to get out my thermometer to test the waters to make sure that the liquid was the perfect temperature for the yeast to do it's thing. Everything was perfect. All the planets were aligned, angels were singing, it couldn't have been more perfect. So I added the flour. Lovingly placed a clean towel over the dough, and set it in my oven so that it had a warm draft free place to rise for the next 60 minutes. I even set the timer on the microwave so that I wouldn't forget and later discover that the dough had taken over my oven and was attempting to grow to fit my house.

Cue Jeopardy music.

Ding Ding Ding!!!

Now it was time. I just knew that when I opened the oven and pulled the dough out that it would have risen to a lovely level and it would just be perfect. I held my breath in anticipation. I quickly whisked the towel away...

Holy Mother Fluffer Nutter!!!

The freaking yeast was apparently pissed. Because it might have risen .2 inches. Might.

Well played yeast, well played.

So I thought, well, it's a little humid, it's a little blah blah blah. We will just poke it back in the oven and see what happens.

Cue Jeopardy music. Lots and lots of Jeopardy music. Like 4.5 hours of music. Finally it had risen enough that I was going to pretend that it was doubled in size. Thankfully my recipe had a get out of jail free card. You could add the remaining dry ingredients and then you could put the dough in the refrigerator and you had 3 days to use it. Awesome. Because now it's 9pm, and I don't want to stay up until 2 am making cinnamon rolls.

So I added the ingredients. Well, the dough was a little too dry for their to be any stirring involved. So I basically had to manipulate it in my hands (aka knead) to get those ingredients incorporated. I plopped the dough in a bowl, covered it with plastic wrap and put it in the fridge. Figuring I would tackle it when I got home from work yesterday.

That is until some unknown force caused me to open the door to the refrigerator at 11 pm. Uh, you remember that dough that wouldn't rise. Well, it was rising now. Like another 1.5 hours and it would have taken over a shelf in my fridge.

Nuts and bolts!

So after a reluctant call to my mother, and some relaying of information. I discovered what I did wrong (apparently the yeast is like a man and likes to be played with before you can expect him to rise to the occasion). So we divided the dough up into 4 bowls (just to be on the safe side), and hoped that it wouldn't take over my fridge during the wee hours of the night.

Thankfully the dough didn't take over my fridge, and half of it has already been made, baked and shipped off to it's new home. Round 2 will commence tonight. I'm thankful that I have tackled this cooking adventure. I'm thankful that the dough didn't wind up in the dumpster.

Yeast 1 - Abby 0

Wordless Wednesday

I have been cooking like a crazy woman.  Check out some of my latest and greatest finds.  Keep checking back for the recipe and my review on some of these!

Cheeseburger Paradise Soup

Apple Bread

Chili Verde Stew

Cinnamon Bun Pancakes with Maple Icing

Life Trucks On

Well, I would love to have something funny, mildly hilarious, or even slightly thought provoking for you today.  But instead my brain is swimming around with carbohydrates. 

Thanks homework for sabotaging my life, and apparently this blog post too.

How about a few updates then?  It's better than something crazy that I might come up with instead.

-John's grandfather is trucking along.  After more testing he has cancer on a lung as well as his liver.  He has began chemo treatments and seems to be handling them well.  He will continue those for a few weeks before he has more scans and tests to see how the cancer is reacting.

-Bailey.  The boxer that we rescued.  He is still living with us.  A part of us wants to keep him, and a part of us wants to see him go to a home that doesn't have another little mean dog like Blaze.  They get along fine, when no one is looking.  If Blaze catches you looking those kisses that she was just giving him turns into snarls and growls. 

-I still haven't heard anything on my application yet.  They have had it since Monday, surely they have read it and realize how wonderful I am, and they want me to join their campus.  Plus, they could sure use the money.

-I'm looking forward to Thanksgiving, mostly for the days off work.  I'm tired of homework and work.  I just have a case of the blah's.  I would wish for excitement, but it usually isn't the kind that I want.  So we will keep the blah's, thankyouverymuch!

-I'm still not finished with Christmas shopping.  However, I am finishing off my grandfather's gifts this weekend.  Amazingly so I only have 6 people left, and a couple of "extras" in case someone else should pop up that I'm not prepared for.  So, it's not quite as bad as it seems.  Plus, based on circumstances that my niece and nephew are currently facing, I would like to do a little more for them than I have done.

-Debbie and her husband are getting a divorce.  I'm sad for them, and their children.  I'm also thankful that I'm married to a good man, and that after almost 11 years we still have a good, solid relationship.  I'm sad that one or both, depends on who you talk to, had done childish things to "hurt" the other person.  They are forgetting that there are two children whose lives will be forever changed and impacted by the decisions that they make, and by how "adult" like their parents act.

-I've been cooking new recipes again.  I have been taking pictures of the final results.  But not step by step pictures.  Mostly because some of this cooking is taking place at night, and I don't want the pictures coming out "yellow" because I'm not using natural light.  Although twice this week, I took the pictures outside before it got dark. 

-Well, now that I'm not thinking about carbohydrates and the retarded presentation that I have to work on this afternoon, I think I'll go fix my lunch and hope that this afternoon is interruption light, because I have to do my homework and my husbands.

-I'm going to be participating in some other blogs "theme days" for a while.  I'm just so overwhelmed with work and school, that without a little guidance, you will be lucky to get monthly posts.  Look for the first one tomorrow!

~Life is not the way it's supposed to be.  It's the way it is.  The way you cope with it is what makes a difference.  ~Edna Ellison

Recipes - Here Today, Gone Tomorrow

Ok, so that title should be more like here yesterday, not any longer.

I talked to my mom yesterday. (now I'm waiting for the phone to ring, because that's what usually happens when I type her name on here.) Hmmm, her radar must be turned off.

So this is all her fault. If you want her email address, just let me know.

As I was cooking dinner last night, I decided that I needed another blog, because you know, I have so much free time. Actually, it's an idea I have been playing around with for a while, because SOME (my father) people, don't like me poking recipes in with my other ramblings. So I have laid off the recipes for a while, trying to come up with a plan of attack.

As I was cooking dinner last night, I came up with a plan. A new blog!!

So I created Gourmet Chef in Training. You are so very welcome. It's nothing but food. Nothing that will make you cry, well except onions. Nothing to make you laugh, because food isn't funny. If it starts telling jokes I think we have bigger problems. I have also created a link on the top of my blog that will take you to it, you know in case you forgot to bookmark it. And so I can find it too. I have some awesome ideas for it; ideas that don't require near as much thought as this blog. But you can read about all of those over there. I'm still in the process of getting it "perfect", and you know, I have to work, otherwise I couldn't pay for my internet and then my farm would die. It's all about priorities people!!

~Beef, it's what's for dinner. -Beef Tv Commercial

Hello, my name is....

Hello, my name is Abby, and I'm addicted to....it's just so awful, I can't say it. I can't!

It's true. I know it's shocking, but think about how I felt, discovering I was an addict. It's a scary lonely feeling. One that I haven't even openly admitted to myself that there was a problem, until today. I can't hide the truth any longer.

I'm addicted.

I was avoiding doing anything productive at work, and was checking out a few of the blogs that I read today for updates. Actually for new recipes, because our menu needs some major CPR. Most of the blogs I follow are all big time bloggers. They get paid, and they are at the Blogher conference in New York City. Lucky bastards. Someday that will be me, I'll be some bigtime blogger and people will hang onto my every word and I can go spend 5 glorious days in New York City. But, until then... But I digress.

Where was I?

Oh yeah, CPR and recipes.

I was looking for something gourmet, yet not weird enough that my husband and I won't eat it. And I popped on over to Ree at The Pioneer Woman , she is giving away this absolutely gorgeous purple pot. If you wait for it, the pictures will scroll across her homepage. If you look today. If not, look at that cute little butterfly border at the bottom. Do you see it? Well, the placement of said pan and the placement of the butterflies, made me think that the pan had butterflies on it, and forget trying to win it. I was buying that puppy. So I clicked over to the giveaway area and started researching how to win it. Needless to say I was disgusted that it was missing the butterflies, but thought I would take a gander at the website that the purple pan could be found on. Oh My Goodness!!

Can we say cooking heaven? Would it be tacky to email my wish list to all my friends and family and tell them that all birthday and Christmas gifts MUST be purchased from here or they will be disowned? Maybe disowned is a little harsh, perhaps, ignored, their prescense ripped from my life forever is a little less harsh.

I started browsing, and decided I would start putting things I have no intention of purchasing today in my cart. Holy smokes batman. I'm not even halfway through and I have like, well lets just say A LOT of money in that cart. There are things that I'm amazed that I have been able to cook at all without. There are things that are just plain cool, things that are just plain wicked, and they are things that I need. They are like air, I can no longer cook properly without them. I wonder if my husband would be mad if I cleaned out our savings, checking, and maxed out several credit cards to fund this little endeavor?

I don't think he would. In fact I can guarantee that he won't mind eating ramen noodles for a few months. Or living without hot water. Those things are of a minute importance in the grand scheme of things. Right?

So let's try this one more time.

Hello, my name is Abby, and I'm addicted to...cooking gadgets and gizmo's, and pots and pans, cookbooks and recipes, I do like them, Abby I am.

Now I'm off to search for recipes, hopefully I won't be distracted by purple pans with butterflies.

Cooking and Recipes

I love to cook. So consequently have about a bazillion recipes. I have a modest collection of cookbooks as well as a ton that I have printed off the internet over the years. Most of my recipes are "healthy". They sound like they are fattening and instead they are good for you. It's a win-win situation, especially if you are trying to loose a few pounds.

Since this is my blog and I can write about what I want to, I'm going to post new recipes that we try out. Mostly so that I can make grocery lists while I'm at work and conserve time. I'll always post recipes that I have actually made, with my planned alterations for next time, as well as how it rates on a 5-star review. Then you can make it yourself and post your own comments in the comments section. (This is obviously in hopes that more than 5 people read this blog.)

UPDATE - my recipes can now be found at Gourmet Chef in Training