Thursday, February 2, 2012

Wanted: Personal Assistant

Wanted: Personal Assistant

Job Duties: Approximately 4 loads of laundry per week; this includes gathering, washing, folding and putting away. Cleaning 1 bathroom. Cleaning of 1 smallish kitchen. Dusting. Vacuuming as well as mopping of said bathroom and kitchen. You must also have a job that currently pays you at least $200,000 per year that you contribute to our GDP. You must cook meals that I preapprove of. You must do all grocery shopping, using extreme couponing methods (gotta save money). If I don't feel like sitting through a class today, you should also be able to go in my absence. You should also always know all the material well enough to take exams and pass them with a minimum grade of a B. At night, when I've had a really hard day I would appreciate a massage and a hot bath. You should be flexible enough to be available to meet my every need, even if that need occurs at 2am and again at 4am.

Would like someone who doesn't mind watching Friends, CSI, Army Wives, and The Food Network. Must love dogs and be willing to housebreak any new additions to our family.

Cat and other rodent owners need not apply.

Please send your resume and references to my email. We have a smallish room that has a spare chair that will be your sleeping quarters (it also doubles as my office) but I will be courteous enough to try to not study while you sleep.

Thank you.

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